I'm trying to live out of love these days - and using a definition that has come from a friend of mine, Rebecca Adams. To love means that I desire the fullness of myself and those around me. This ties into a teleological view of life - I was created to become something, and so were you, and so were we. It also ties into a belief that deep down inside each of us are desires that are the key to fulfilling our life's callings. Martha Beck calls the locus of these desires "our essential self" and encourages us to be aware of this self when seeking discernment on living our life.

 I can't live this way without another belief - which is, there is a good which is good for all of us, and if I wait and imagine and creatively engage my thoughts and the thoughts of others,  this good will become apparent. Last summer I found myself asking the question "What wants to happen?" And a related question "Where are the energies leading me?" I trusted that if I wanted to do something (in this case, take a vacation to New England) that it would be good for my family. If it wasn't good for my family, the desire would dissipate and another option would open up.

A therapist I've met mentioned last week that there is a discomfort when you are waiting for resolution, sitting in the unknowing, unable even to imagine a solution. The discomfort that comes when multiple voices seem to be in conflict. To wait in the discomfort requires faith - faith that good is there to be found, and that you will be able to recognize it when it arrives. Faith that, if you wait, a new path will open. 

So to love means that I live out of the hope that the person I was created to be is possible. I choose to believe that what is good for me is good for those around me, and vice versa. And I am willing to wait - even in the discomfort of the process.

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